Illustrative Invocations: Andi Soto’s Dark Exploration of the Human Condition
By Elizah Leigh
With flowing locks that at times appear to be as much of a supernatural entity as the secrets that they are surely summoning from the winds, Andi Soto’s feminine, occasionally feathered deities - often sporting elaborate headdresses accented with a profusion of botanicals and jeweled adornments - epitomize our idealized notion of an otherworldly goddess who is unencumbered by modesty-shrouding garments. The mixed media artist’s sublime ladies must not suffer the limitations of woven clothing, which would only compromise the spectacle of their earthly physicality and impede the sacred hand gestures that their multiple limbs are positioned in.
Superficially speaking, her gloriously comely muses - some exalted with lacy golden halos befitting of their rarified status – are everything that we are not, their alluringly fixed gazes suggesting that they have far more important things to accomplish than whatever fluffy nonsense mere mortals tend to trouble themselves with. What makes an artist’s profession so fulfilling is the fact that they are entirely in charge of what they choose to do with their muses. Andi Soto’s porcelain-visaged beauties indeed compel the viewer to drop everything they’re doing in order to get a closer look, but they aren’t just pretty bits of gothic-tinged eye candy.
The Panama-born creator’s emissaries are an artistic manifestation of her own ever-changing moods, portraying her own moments of melancholy, hope, despair, and even impending doom. In essence, they can be viewed as the dark ambassadors of life’s raw, real, bumpy, rollercoaster-y, ‘warts-n-all’ journey. Our global culture will likely continue to convince us that if we’re not experiencing an easy breezy ride, then there’s probably something wrong with us. For the fourteen years that Andi Soto has been coaxing her higher feminine powers to the surface of her canvases however, she’s embraced the cathartic process of manifesting artistic beauty that delivers myriad shades of the truthful human experience.
The ride can be astoundingly magical… sometimes appallingly dreadful… we can find ourselves dragging spiritually… and then we inevitably muster the energy to rise from the ashes. Processing that refreshingly unvarnished reality through the lens of her beguiling metaphysical beings just makes it all slide down just a little bit easier, wouldn’t you agree?
Interview with Andi Soto
Beginning around the age of five, you spent a great deal of time drawing landscapes, ponies and dragons, plus you also loved creating rollercoasters and planes with LEGO bricks. What other childhood pursuits helped sow the seeds of your creativity?
Being introduced to the owner’s manuals of various video games – such as Legend of Zelda, which has beautifully illustrated booklets that I loved so much - was a breakthrough for me. I also became obsessed with anime and manga in my adolescence.
Artists often attribute genetics to their creative leanings, but I wonder how much of a role your secluded upbringing in the jungle of Panama also played.
My father was such a creative individual - not only in applied arts, but also with respect to solving problems with mechanical objects - so I think my early predilection for creativity was a combination of both genetics and environment.
You were nestled in the jungle and yet you lived just 20km away from school. Visually and culturally, those two places must have been starkly different! Did being the ‘jungle weirdo’ in your school positively or negatively impact your overall social experience?
I was one of the three or four classmates who lived away from the city, and even though I was definitely a jungle weirdo, I was never ashamed of it. Despite not being able to go to parties like the rest of my classmates (since they were so far away), I loved where I lived.
During a time when the internet wasn’t nearly as rich with resources as it is today, you were conducting deep-dives into manga and anime. How long did your art analysis last – months? years?
It lasted my entire adolescence. The website Anime Turnpike was a hot mess, but it really helped me to discover so many things. I was indulging in Sailor Moon and Dragon Ball when I was 10 years old, and then Sakura Card Captors, Neon Genesis Evangelion and other animes between 14 and 16 years of age. Sailor Moon and Dragon Ball were even broadcast on public television - how cool is that?
In our adolescent and teenage years, we develop fierce passions that - in the next instant - almost as quickly fizzle out. Why was manga/anime so consistently compelling to you?
I was drawn to their unique illustrative styles and stories. I never had the money to buy the mangas or purchase anime tapes, but at school, I would print the ones that really appealed to me at 10 cents a page (using the money that my parents gave me for food, haha). I rarely ate when I found new imagery that I liked, and would return home with a huge stack of printed material.
Are you as obsessed with manga/anime today as you were in your younger years?
I’m still obsessed with manga, but a different genre now. I’m an avid fan of Junji Ito, so every time I see his work, I have to get it.
You credit your high school English teacher with exposing you to the Japanese animated film “Ghost in the Shell” for the first time, an experience that made you become a die-hard fan of manga artist Masamune Shirow / Shirō Masamune (who created the “Ghost in the Shell” manga upon which that animated film was based). What characteristics of his art blew your mind wide open?
Masamune Shirow was way ahead of his time - his mechanical animations were out of this world and I was enamoured with his heavily detailed landscape design, too. I still watch that movie for comfort and find that as an adult, I appreciate the music and the emotions even more.
It seems like there was a period of time in your early youth when you became extremely serious about creating your own manga series. Did you ever end up submitting anything for publication?
I practiced my manga illustration skills by creating different clothing and scenarios like Sailor Moon with mechanical wings, or armours for different zodiac signs from Saint Seiya.
Eventually, I even tried to create an original manga series, but since my storytelling was weak, I decided not to complete it.
Now that you have a ‘professional artist perspective’, have you taken the time to revisit the manga/anime drawings that you created back then? Have you made any observations about your concepts, rendering skills, etc.?
I love how I did my best to create something unique. It wasn’t oh so unique, but creating it helped me to gain a better understanding of anatomy, flow and execution of styles. I don’t see any rights and wrongs - that pressure only started later on when I wanted to become a professional.
Do you recognise any traits in those early drawings that you’ve retained in your work today?
I do - it’s the eyes. Some of them lack defined pupils and irises, like in manga. These days, I always find myself adding extra brightness or little details in the eyes of my various muses.
Every child shares their “when I grow up” ambitions with their parents, but not all of us recall the specific proclamations that our former selves uttered (that may have pointed directly toward the path that we’re navigating today). Do you have any strong childhood memories of art being the thing that you were made for?
Yes, my entire life drawing always felt right to me. I did try musical instruments like guitar, keyboards and drums but always went back to drawing. Prior to being exposed to anime and manga, I recall being about five years old and telling my parents that I wanted to be a painter (as well as a horse rider…but I was too tall for that😉).
Your family encouraged your creative expression and yet career-wise, they were far more hopeful that you’d become formally educated in a field with a financially stable track record. Advertising ended up being your focus, followed by a decade as a sales/customer care/tech support agent for Dell. Just how much time did you spend during that period of your life creating art (or did art entirely fall to the wayside)?
I had the thirst to create all the time - I never truly stopped drawing entirely.
When you decide to accomplish something, it seems like you make sure that you become excellent at it by studying the heck out of it. Is that connected to your deep desire to be successful… or are you simply just a curious person who likes to learn all there is to know about a specific subject?
The connection with the path of creation runs deep.
Even though it feels nice to be successful as a contemporary artist, I never expected to be recognised for my work… and I choose to not allow it to affect me. What has always been gold for me is sharing stories and learning how fans interpret my work.
Ultimately, I just need to create. My goal with art has always been to communicate what’s inside.
Is your affection for artistic subject matter such as female anatomy, morbidity, and botanicals common among the anime/manga genre, or is it more specifically embraced by some of the Japanese illustrators who you admire?
All of the topics that I gravitate toward are deeply connected with the Japanese illustrators that I am continually inspired by. I keep discovering the work of old masters from Japan – such as Shiro Kasamatsu (I love his out-of-this world mastery of light!) - which makes me want to create even more boundary-pushing pieces of my own.
Which of the signature elements in your art do you find most satisfying to render?
The process of deliberately rendering strands of hair connects my brain to the physical medium in my hand. I also enjoy designing bouquets of flowers with morbid elements such as body parts, bones or other trinkets.
In what way has your artistic perspective been influenced by your Panamanian heritage and your current experience living in Croatia?
My upbringing was full of colour, laughter and nostalgia. I’ve always had an obsession with Panama’s tropical jungle surroundings and the fact that Latin Americans are so loving. In Croatia, I’ve learned to live in four seasons and appreciate how the landscape changes with them, but in terms of culture, it’s interesting that Panamanians and people in the Balkans (especially Croatians) share a very similar approach to nostalgia and sadness.
When you’re bitten by the inspiration bug, instead of creating a pre-sketch (which you find somewhat boring), you just go straight to the main event. That sounds exciting but also perhaps a bit… uhhh…risky?
Since my brain is constantly in overdrive, ideas endlessly pop in my head. My personal rule is to execute – that’s it! I tend to experiment all the time without caring about the outcome. What really matters to me, more than anything else, is if what I’m creating on the page looks and feels good. If it doesn’t feel good, then I destroy it and start all over again.
Anyone with an affection for art materials can see that your creative output relies quite heavily on fine liners and various other tried-and-true mixed media materials. For the art nerds reading this interview though, would you mind telling us exactly what can always be found in your creative toolbox?
The physical labor of working with Micron 003 and 005 fine liners makes me feel complete – I live for it! – so they’re always part of my repertoire.
I also use the same box of Prismacolor pencils that my dad gave me as a birthday gift when I was 18 years old. When I reach the point that a pencil is so stubby that it is no longer usable, I’ll just tuck a brand-new replacement pencil right back into the same box. I also use L’Aquarelle and Grumbacher brand watercolours and Kruel brand gouache.
By the way, after using watercolours for so long, trying gouache was a eureka moment!
You claim that you’ve “never been good with words”. However, amid the various captions accompanying the art that you share on your Instagram profile - some of them the musings of sage philosophers or snippets from classical literature - you also share quite a few of your own personal observations. The meditative quality of your thoughts - which meshes beautifully with the spirit of your art – suggests that you are very interested in delivering a zen experience to your audience. Is that your intent?
Since I leave a part of myself and my essence within my art, yes, always.
As spiritually infused as your mixed media pieces may be, you still seem to cast them with a heavy-handed dose of shadowy melancholy. Since our species is hell-bent on understanding and dissecting and categorizing creative output, do you regard what you create as ‘half glass empty’ or ‘half glass full’ art?
I create half glass empty art since I like people to fill the rest of the glass with their own emotions and experiences.
Anyone who keeps up with your social media posts will likely recall seeing a recent video clip of you ushering in your fourth decade of life in full goth mistress glory. Should we jump to the conclusion that - whenever you’re interested in fanning the flames of your own creative practice - you specifically consume the work of dark artists, or is your taste for visual inspiration far more expansive?
I love discovering old artists and new. I consume everything that’s being thrown at me.
Has motherhood amplified your passion for your craft? Do you find yourself treasuring stolen moments *while engaging in artistic creation* even more than you previously did?
Living the life of an artist is a rollercoaster, and being a parent makes it even more challenging, however, I definitely feel inspired to create beautiful things for my son to enjoy in the future. As Apollonia Saintclair would say, ink is my blood… art runs in my veins. I want people to see how I feel about the world, both within myself and around me, and art is the way… it’s my entire existence.
During the creative process, I do lots of psychological analysis on everything that’s happening in my surroundings and how I feel. When I stop creating, I’ll cease to exist.
In what way did your younger artist self completely dive off the deep end for your craft?
When I was around 16 years old, I learned that the artist Luis Royo would become a total recluse when he was working on projects. He would hardly eat, sleep or even go outside for fresh air. I took that so seriously that I thought I had to do the same thing, until I found out that I actually do enjoy hanging out with people and breathing fresh air.
Regarding what you’ve learned in your journey as an artist so far, would you please share a parting thought that might help those who are newly emerging?
Sometimes, I still don’t know what I’m doing!
There is one thing, though, that I definitely understand. If your key goal is to gain social media popularity, that will not make you ‘The Artist” because it’s not the right motivation. At least for me, establishing a real connection with people has always been far more validating than amassing a huge amount of followers.